Imagine, for a moment, that you're a soldier in World War II who is stationed in a foxhole. The hole is deep, dry, and secure. You're safe from small arms fire barring the enemy hopping in the foxhole with you. (This happened to my grandfather in WWII. As a result, there was one less Nazi and one more me!) For the past week, there has been no sight or sound of the enemy. Your boredom eventually gets the better of your vigilance and your days are mostly dominated by scratching, picking and chewing.
It's a Tuesday afternoon. The sun, clouds, and breeze are creating the perfect atmospheric conditions. You wonder if sitting in this foxhole most of the day is so bad. Then...something happens. Your foxhole is now inhabited by both yourself and a live grenade. If you wish to stay in one piece, then it's time for action. Freeze this picture before you put your hands on the grenade.... The picture I'm trying to paint is an analogy of what we go through in our heads everyday. The foxhole is your tranquility of mind. The grenade is the disturbances we face everyday. And the man in the foxhole is our power to decide and respond.
Just like the man in the foxhole with his grenade, we can become anxious and alarmed by all of the sudden disturbances we happen upon. Maybe you're driving on the highway and someone cuts you off. Or you're visited by your significant other and they tell you they don't want to be with you. Or your brother calls you and tells you your father has cancer. Or, god forbid, you get on the scale and it tells you you're five pounds heavier than last week! Our tranquility of mind (foxhole) has been threatened by these events/disturbances (grenade) and it is up to us (soldier) to respond.
Back to the foxhole... You could argue otherwise but there are three pertinent options in this scenario. The first one is to be so riddled with alarm and anxiety that you're sharing space with a grenade that you let it linger and make mince meat of your delicate flesh and ruin the safety of your foxhole. The second option is to be alarmed and anxious but still go about the task of removing the grenade with the hopes that your state doesn't cause you to delay or fumble about too much. The third option is to be the consummate soldier, and without anxiety and without delay, to remove that grenade from your coordinates on the double with extreme prejudice. In other words, to act like you've been there before because you have, My gut tells me that most people would probably exercise the second option. Some might make it out, some might not.
However, when it comes to our tranquility of mind the vast majority of us pick the first option and let every unwanted thing that comes into our foxhole disrupt our tranquility. Where is it written in stone that all bad things need to upset us? How hypocritical we sound as we scold our children (quit being a baby!) for this behavior when, at least, they have an excuse! I ran into a woman who said she is the epitome of patience and tolerance at her job with customers because she values it so much but otherwise flies off the handle when not working. My first response is to thank her for proving that we have the choice and power to choose how we respond to the world. My second response is to say, "Huh? Are you telling me that you value your job over the calm of your own mind? Why wouldn't you want to behave like you do at work all the time?". The option exists, if we have the fortitude and the awareness, to lob back these grenades to the enemy. For where does it matter you are, with whom does it matter you're with, and to what matter are your actions if you're safe and secure in that foxhole inside your mind?
